Saturday, March 27, 2010

Abnormal Phenomena

A Rab Wilson over St Andrews

I am perturbed to note that the British Government is cutting the budget of the Department devoted to investigating paranormal activity, especially in the light of the recent rash of Rab Wison sightings.

The proliferation of Rab Wilsons is one of the great unexplained phenomena of recent times. Typically appearing in or near literary festivals, Rab Wilsons have been explained away as weather balloons but the resemblance is superficial.

Seamus Heaney recently described a close encounter:

"I was appearing at a prominent poetry festival when I began to get an eery feeling that I was being watched. I withdrew to the toilet and was shocked to find, when I opened the soap dish, Rab Wilson hidden inside. Running from the room my fear and amazement were further compounded when I saw Dennis O Driscoll with a Rab Wilson attached to each trouser leg. I am now scared to leave my house."

The origins of this phenomenon are vague but it is thought that Rab Wilson was a writer, originally.


Jimmy Bastard said...

Seamus Heaney, the only man ever truly to bring real beauty out of the wonderful County of Derry.

Titus said...

I think you are a very bad man.

Titus said...

A very bad man. I can't stop laughing long enough to inhale.

hope said...

I'd help you Titus, but I fear I'm in the same condition.

pilgrimchick said...

Lots of insight from the guy who translated Beowulf.