Friday, October 26, 2007


October slides into November. It is dreich, smurry, even. Maybe a bit blowsy. Don't know, the jury's out.

We were in Minorca for a week, which was very nice, though there was more precipitation than was helpful and I lost the kids' teletubbies on the aeroplane, a fact we have managed to keep cunningly concealed from them while frantic attempts are made to find substitutes, a labour not made easier by the fact that these were ORIGINAL DISCONTINUED Teletubbies, delux velur beanies, not the old trash you can buy now. The £365 spent on the intensive MUZZY language course for the kids proved money well spent, as they were able to order dinner every night in Catalan and hold conversations about the weather, the value of the Euro against sterling, and the prospects of the Rangers Barcelona game with a variety of waiters and housemaids. In fact they said nothing, though Lydia was heard to mumble "timida" once, as she turned scarlet faced away from another attempt to make her talk. In fact she came away from Holiday with more knowledge of Welsh than Spanish, as there were several lovely welsh kiddies in the pool whose English was obviously poor, or non-existent.

Wouldn't it be great if we could all speak Gaelic? We could sit in the lounge bar of the Withered Giblet and abuse the English without them understanding a word we said.

My mother was a native gaelic speaker but never taught us- she thought English the way forward, daft wumman.

On returning to Drumsleet I visit local thistlemilk entrepreneur Theosyphilis Neil in hospital. Having discovered some new and obscure benefit to claim, Theosyphilis resolved in mid October to break his right leg for the 43rd time and is now in plaster up to his oxters. Hospital appears to be the man's ideal milieu, however, for he is to found every afternoon in a wheelchair in the shrubbery outside conducting a series of dodgy deals with other salubrious denizens of Drumsleet whose intemperate habits have led them to temporary residence alongside him. "See the f......contraband in this place, Shug" says Theosyphilis rubbing his hands together with glee, "get every day and make a f..........fortune at the same time.. Do you think you could lend me twenty quid to get started?"


hope said...

Visiting here is like taking a much needed vacation that my pitiful salary does not afford. :)

However, when visiting in another country, one is often in need of a dictionary. Okay, so the writer in me loved the sound of the words in your first paragraph but is not certain I comprehend them all. You think the English have a problem...factor in the murder and decline of how my fellow Americans supposedly speak English and it gets even trickier. I fear that Text Messaging is the beginning of the decline in what culture we have. :)

Asi, yo necessito una diccionario para tu lengua, por favor. Quiero mis ojos comprender tu lengua mas bonita. Gracias.

Bet that's the only time I get to "speak" Spanish with a man from Scotland. ;)

Sorlil said...

'daft wumman' - ha, my mother is also a Gaelic speaker who never taught my brother or myself, however I'm getting her to teach my son!