It's funny isn't it that just when you think life is impossible, that your enemies are irresistible and that that tight feeling in your forhead is a sure indication of a fatal thrombosis or at least a massive brain hemorrhage, that something good and cheery occurs?
This morning, for instance, after a long and fevered night thinking of all the ways to spend the 75p I've got to last till next Tuesday, mixed up with the grinning and triumphant face of TIM DOWD celebrating another literary coup, I awoke sweating to find a buzzing on my mobile phone indicating a message from a very close friend. It was from Ronnie Fisher, a well known and highly gifted wildlife painter, and one of these rare and altruistic folk who really make a difference in life, who actually do, by their bearing and consideration for others, lighten the step and share the burden.
I scrolled down the luminous green screen. It read:
EVERYBODY HATES YOU
BECAUSE YOU'RE A KNOBEND.